Parents on the side...
 
Notifications
Clear all

Parents on the sidelines

Page 2 / 3

CoachDP
(@coachdp)
Kryptonite
Joined: 11 years ago
Posts: 17873
 

Sideline Banter is just that.  If you worry about what they say behind your back you're not long for this job.

While it's true that you can't allow the sturm and drang of parental banter to bother you, you're better off if it never even gets started.  Parents can light a fuse that can be difficult to extinguish.  You're better off not giving them the match.

--Dave

"The Greater the Teacher, the More Powerful the Player."

The Mission Statement: "I want to show any young man that he is far tougher than he thinks, that he can accomplish more than what he dreamed and that his work ethic will take him wherever he wants to go."

#BattleReady newhope


ReplyQuote
Dusty Ol Fart
(@youth-coach)
Diamond
Joined: 8 years ago
Posts: 7700
 

While it's true that you can't allow the sturm and drang of parental banter to bother you, you're better off if it never even gets started.  Parents can light a fuse that can be difficult to extinguish.  You're better off not giving them the match.

--Dave

Dave, my point is that if you cover this in the parents meeting 99% of this never starts.  If it does continue (Stubborn Folks) you have the meeting with them using Option B, Find another team on the table!  A few years back I was TOLD that a certain player would play because Mom was angry at his lack of playing time.  I TOLD the Board Member that under no circumstance would he play and showed him my attendance sheet with 3 of 12 Possible X's filled in.  Mom went nuts!  He didnt play.  However, he did show up to practice from that point on!  🙂   

Not MPP... ONE TASK!  Teach them!  🙂


ReplyQuote
CoachDP
(@coachdp)
Kryptonite
Joined: 11 years ago
Posts: 17873
 

Dave, my point is that if you cover this in the parents meeting 99% of this never starts

Roger that.  You know I not only cover it, but go A-Z on it.  They have my card, number, email addy, facebook page, Sunday Night Phone Call, Off-season Action Plan....if they THINK it, I know it.  I am a regular Carnac the Magnificent.  😉

--Dave

"The Greater the Teacher, the More Powerful the Player."

The Mission Statement: "I want to show any young man that he is far tougher than he thinks, that he can accomplish more than what he dreamed and that his work ethic will take him wherever he wants to go."

#BattleReady newhope


ReplyQuote
CoachAD
(@coachad)
Silver
Joined: 11 years ago
Posts: 757
 

  I got an email from a dad this past Monday after our first padded practice.  His son wasn't allowed to put on pads yet because he was on vacation during the first week of practice.  I did not have a good plan to keep him engaged and he was the only one not in full pads.  I had him "observing".  He was rarely coached during the hour and half of live practice.  It was 100% my fault for not having a plan and not recognizing the issue during the practice.  Most of the email was very accurate.  There was a little parental frustration that bled over into "if you don't like my kid" sentences toward the end.  He sent the email to the Park and Rec Board before he sent it to me - or more accurately, he sent two different emails with much the same message.

  I think he was surprised when I took the following steps:

1. I acknowledged the mistakes I made, explained how they got made, and promised to address it. 
2. I copied the AD on my reply to the dad - to show transparency.
3. We've had a lot of rain in Georgia.  I offered to have a "make up practice" just for his son, followed by a conversation with mom and dad, if any of our practices were cancelled due to rain or field conditions.  Practice was cancelled that night and I met them and the player went from being behind to being ahead of everyone else at his position.

  I'd say that the mom and dad who were the most displeased are now two of my biggest advocates.  They were shocked I'd have a private make up practice just for their son.  I didn't make excuses, I owned my mistakes and gave some reasons why things happened and how I was going to prevent them from happening again.  It was one of the most productive 1.5 hour time blocks I've had this season.

 


ReplyQuote
CoachDP
(@coachdp)
Kryptonite
Joined: 11 years ago
Posts: 17873
 

and how I was going to prevent them from happening again.

--So how are you going to keep it from happening again?

It was one of the most productive 1.5 hour time blocks I've had this season.

--And there ya go, Alex.  It'd never have happened, if you didn't make yourself available to them.  And there's a big difference between having an "open door" and "inviting them in."  Glad it worked out, but not surprised.

--Dave

"The Greater the Teacher, the More Powerful the Player."

The Mission Statement: "I want to show any young man that he is far tougher than he thinks, that he can accomplish more than what he dreamed and that his work ethic will take him wherever he wants to go."

#BattleReady newhope


ReplyQuote
CoachAD
(@coachad)
Silver
Joined: 11 years ago
Posts: 757
 

  --So how are you going to keep it from happening again?

Coach,

  There were 2 "triggers" in the complaint.

1. The lack of coaching in the padded practice. 
      A. From now on, any un-padded player will hit a coach with a shield to work on "future" pad level.
      B. When this is not practical, the un-padded player will stand with the coach and get instruction based on other players reps.
      C. I'll go through our drill manual and specifically classify which drill can be performed un-padded and which are position specific.  We kind of know this inherently now BUT if I'm out, I don't know that my assistants could pick this up on the "fly".
      D. In other words, we will have a practice plan for un-padded players as well as padded players.

2. When working on offense we separated our backs and line.  I went with the line and line coach while I had another coach with the backs.  The player in question had lined up at a wingback in Mondays practice.  I mistakenly thought this 7 year old who had 1 football practice in his life would remember his position OR my AC working with the backs would remember it.  I was wrong, and should have known I was wrong.  The player in question was not rotating in with the other wingbacks and it wasn't noticed until I move over to the group approximately 20 minutes into the session.
    A.  I'll quit making stupid assumptions  😉


ReplyQuote
CoachDP
(@coachdp)
Kryptonite
Joined: 11 years ago
Posts: 17873
 

In other words, we will have a practice plan for un-padded players as well as padded players.

I think everyone should have this, if you have practices where they have to be without pads for a certain duration.  In Pop Warner, where everyone has to get their 10 hours of conditioning before receiving pads, there are often stragglers and latecomers who have not received 10 hours while other players have already received their gear.  Gotta have separate plans for separate groups.

--Dave

"The Greater the Teacher, the More Powerful the Player."

The Mission Statement: "I want to show any young man that he is far tougher than he thinks, that he can accomplish more than what he dreamed and that his work ethic will take him wherever he wants to go."

#BattleReady newhope


ReplyQuote
patriotsfatboy1
(@patriotsfatboy1)
Platinum
Joined: 8 years ago
Posts: 3260
 

I think everyone should have this, if you have practices where they have to be without pads for a certain duration.  In Pop Warner, where everyone has to get their 10 hours of conditioning before receiving pads, there are often stragglers and latecomers who have not received 10 hours while other players have already received their gear.  Gotta have separate plans for separate groups.

--Dave

That is a good point.  We have the same issue in AYF.  10 hours of mandatory conditioning and we have some kids who have not had any practices as of yet. Can't have them getting even further behind. 


ReplyQuote
CoachDP
(@coachdp)
Kryptonite
Joined: 11 years ago
Posts: 17873
 

Can't have them getting even further behind.

Yes, but some coaches think that means going ahead and giving them gear/allowing them to hit or scrimmage despite not having their 10 hours.  All of my players are getting their 10 hours, if for no other reason that they have to ALL make the same sacrifice to play for me.  There are no short-cuts and if you've missed several days, that means you're still having to get those 10 hours.

--Dave

"The Greater the Teacher, the More Powerful the Player."

The Mission Statement: "I want to show any young man that he is far tougher than he thinks, that he can accomplish more than what he dreamed and that his work ethic will take him wherever he wants to go."

#BattleReady newhope


ReplyQuote
mahonz
(@mahonz)
Kryptonite
Joined: 11 years ago
Posts: 23169
 

Sounds like running as punishment. I used to do this when I first started coaching youth. I would make one or more run because they weren’t, “getting it”. Looking back I wasn’t getting it. I had not figured out how to coach effectively and get across want I wanted done. Sending them to the fence and back was out of frustration of not knowing what the heck to do in order to get them to do what I wanted. I was a poor coach !

Josh....I used to be like that as well.

Now they run to the fence carrying a pvc pipe filled with 10 pounds of rocks that is painted green and covered with helmet award stickers. ( we dont do helmet award stickers) .

I have two of them. They get used often for the first few weeks then tend to lay in the grass and do nothing thereafter for the rest of the season.

What is beautiful, lives forever.


ReplyQuote
CoachDP
(@coachdp)
Kryptonite
Joined: 11 years ago
Posts: 17873
 

They get used often for the first few weeks then tend to lay in the grass and do nothing thereafter for the rest of the season.

Funny how when you establish something like that, and it rarely gets revisited.  Taking a lap, on the other hand, doesn't even get noticed by anyone.

--Dave

"The Greater the Teacher, the More Powerful the Player."

The Mission Statement: "I want to show any young man that he is far tougher than he thinks, that he can accomplish more than what he dreamed and that his work ethic will take him wherever he wants to go."

#BattleReady newhope


ReplyQuote
joshv155
(@joshv155)
Platinum
Joined: 11 years ago
Posts: 3367
 

Roger that.  You know I not only cover it, but go A-Z on it.  They have my card, number, email addy, facebook page, Sunday Night Phone Call, Off-season Action Plan....if they THINK it, I know it.  I am a regular Carnac the Magnificent.  😉

--Dave

Remind me what the Sunday Night Phone call is about. Remember reading it. Is it in your CAL program ?

Passio Bellator


ReplyQuote
CoachDP
(@coachdp)
Kryptonite
Joined: 11 years ago
Posts: 17873
 

Remind me what the Sunday Night Phone call is about. Remember reading it. Is it in your CAL program ?

Yes, it is.  Calling the families once a week, to speak with the player and parent.

--Dave

"The Greater the Teacher, the More Powerful the Player."

The Mission Statement: "I want to show any young man that he is far tougher than he thinks, that he can accomplish more than what he dreamed and that his work ethic will take him wherever he wants to go."

#BattleReady newhope


ReplyQuote
PSLCOACHROB
(@pslcoachrob)
Kryptonite
Joined: 9 years ago
Posts: 12408
 

Remind me what the Sunday Night Phone call is about. Remember reading it. Is it in your CAL program ?

Taking a lap is still, imo, the single biggest waste of time at practice. Wait, the 2nd biggest. Coaches talking too much is the biggest.


ReplyQuote
CoachDP
(@coachdp)
Kryptonite
Joined: 11 years ago
Posts: 17873
 

Taking a lap is still, imo, the single biggest waste of time at practice. Wait, the 2nd biggest. Coaches talking too much is the biggest.

^ This and this. ^

--Dave

"The Greater the Teacher, the More Powerful the Player."

The Mission Statement: "I want to show any young man that he is far tougher than he thinks, that he can accomplish more than what he dreamed and that his work ethic will take him wherever he wants to go."

#BattleReady newhope


ReplyQuote
Page 2 / 3
Share: