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Specially QB dads, why are they all but jobs?

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Popcoach11
(@popcoach11)
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Joined: 9 years ago
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Topic starter  

I haven't had to ever deal with this because honestly around my area, most everyone has always known about both my boys and will never bring their "kid" over to compete. Saying "he'll never get a shot because he's the head coach"..... which is farthest from the truth!!!! I may be the head coach...yes, but I've always put kids that are the best for our team, never for my own goals. Yes my kid has trained extremely hard at his position, but that is no fault of his or mine. In fact I always issue an open invite to anyone who may want to come over and try out and during our evals, I specifically have a QB station so everyone can try out so we can get eyes on everyone 1st few days and don't even include my Lil guy in that station at all ever. In fact I'll pick out the best 2 from our evals, and once we break off into indys, they'll all 3 compete. If my lil guy gets beat out, so be it and I'm totally good with that.

Beginning of this year, had a kid who's an aspiring QB who's got some offseason training. He signed his kid up with our league along with bringing a few other studs along. 1 weeks before we start, he asks our president "who's the HC of the team" president says "so and so" (me), he says ok I think it's best I take my son else where because he won't get a shot at QB because of the HC. Why he would think that is beyond me. Competition breeds success. So he used that excuse to pull his kids and the kids he brought. Completely unfounded!!! Why is it everyone gets a bit of training and all of a sudden they're the best thing since sliced bread??? Seems people want to have things handed to them instead of working/competeing for it? Mind you he's never played a single down at QB. We all know how intensive it is to get the right kid for your team no matter what system you run whether it's spread or the double wing.

I'm seeing ALOT of dads over the years complain about their kid not getting shots at QB over these years and they always seem to be a cancer. At least 3 teams in our league are having this issue, all QBs.....all Dads. Dads shopping around for teams that throw, no matter how good or bad the coaches are.....screw it!!!! My kids a gun slinger and even if we lose every game....he's still throwing the rock!!!! Had a team lower that us go through that with a kids dad this year. Kid is actually pretty good. Dad asked "what offense are you running coach?" Coach replies "wing T, same as the last 13 years (mind you he's won every game for the last 6 years) dad says "oh, never mind my kids a spread read option QB, he'll never play in the wing T" WTF is going through these dads heads?

Why? Help me understand why these guys turn into monsters???


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blockandtackle
(@coacharnold)
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Joined: 8 years ago
Posts: 847
 

There's not much to understand.  They're the LaVar Balls of football and want to live vicariously through their kid and will spend tons of money on camps and private coaching to make that happen.

They don't spend all that time and effort to watch their boy hand off and they know that if they shop around, they'll find someone to feature their boy, no matter how good (or mediocre) he is.  That's just how youth sports are these days, unfortunately.

The worst is when those guys are the HC of a team, so their boy starts and gets all the attention over other, better QBs and athletes at other positions.

It's always QB and WR dads for some reason.  A lot of parents and fans don't care nearly as much about winning and losing as they do about seeing the ball in the air.  At our high school, we had a playoff game a few years ago where we ran for 550 yards with our backup QB and 3rd string RB going for over 200 each (2nd string RB also had 100).  During the broadcast our own radio announcer ripped us as coaches for not throwing the ball more (we were 3-9 with 2 INTs, one of which was a pick 6, in that game).

In their head, this is just wanting the best for their kid, which is noble.  It's better that they be too involved than be one of the parents who doesn't give a rat's butt what their kid does.


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gumby_in_co
(@gumby_in_co)
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Joined: 11 years ago
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When I was on the BoD for my son's hockey club, I dealt with all the parents in my son's age group. Our Pres was a really smart and wise dude and gave me some advice that helped me out over the years dealing with unreasonable parents. Mom's and Dad's have one job and that's to look out for their kid. I'm not saying you have to give an inch, but sometimes it helps to understand where the other side is coming from.

You and I might think that they are making a mistake by going the "D1 QB or Bust" route, but we're not raising their kid. None of our business.

Why do QB dads think that their kid will never get a fair shake vs the HC's kid? Because they will be right 99% of the time. This could have been handled in your pre-season parent meeting, along with your uniform rules. He may or may not have believed you, but you at least have to make it understood that a kid plays where it best benefits the team. Secondarily, he plays where he as the best chance of success . . .which ends up benefiting the team.

As far as the QB dad leaving? He did you a favor. The other dads who followed him? The gift that keeps on giving. Believe me, you don't want the "team chasers". Whatever they bring to the table athletically, they will ultimately be a liability rather than an asset.

When in doot . . . glass and oot.


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Monster
(@monster)
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Joined: 9 years ago
Posts: 1244
 

....

It's always QB and WR dads for some reason.  A lot of parents and fans don't care nearly as much about winning and losing as they do about seeing the ball in the air.  At our high school, we had a playoff game a few years ago where we ran for 550 yards with our backup QB and 3rd string RB going for over 200 each (2nd string RB also had 100).  During the broadcast our own radio announcer ripped us as coaches for not throwing the ball more (we were 3-9 with 2 INTs, one of which was a pick 6, in that game).

People are out of their minds...

Remember, while it's nice to win it's more important to look good doing whatever it is you are doing. Americans can deal with a lot of adversity thrown at them, just not two hours of boredom from sitting in the football stands. That's crippling.

Mission Statement: To make a genuine effort at every opportunity to help those around me build and maintain a commitment to success.


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Popcoach11
(@popcoach11)
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Joined: 9 years ago
Posts: 424
Topic starter  

Gumby this is true. We lay everything out during our parent meeting and even give them a copy of everything prior and have them sign it.

He pulled his kid prior to even getting out on the field with us. Never even had a chance to talk with him about it. I reached out to him about this and never got a response back. Guess he found someone to "feature" his kid which by all means is great. I not THAT GUY and never will be. He made the assumption without knowing the facts or getting it straight from the horses mouth.

Love the fact that the potential cancer is not part of our group.


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coachmiket
(@coachmiket)
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Joined: 11 years ago
Posts: 1372
 

If I'm reading correctly, you have any kid who wants to try out for QB go through the QB drills during the first couple days of practice....except for your son.....then when you decide if any of those kids from the first two days are worthy, they get to compete against your son for the QB position?

Why doesn't your son go through those same drills that the others do on the first two days?


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Wing-n-It
(@robert)
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Joined: 11 years ago
Posts: 3872
 

I went opposite.
When I coached my son for 4 years he never was the QB. I leave all positions up to all the coaches collectively except for my son. I told them he will not be the QB. all my coaches agreed that he would be our best bet but I went against it and he was FB on offense and DE on defense.
My QB I wanted to be with the OC when we on defense to talk about things. Besides I didn't want the shit show of ignorant parents.

So my son through youth ball played EVERY position but one, QB

When he got to MS since he knew every position on the field the HS coach told me and my wife he putting him at QB. He stayed there till he went to an FCS college as a QB. It was in college that they wanted to move him to TE due to his size and hands.

So when I started up another team without him on my team, I used him to remind parents that "whatever position I put your child in doesn't mean he will play that in HS or college."

Sad that this parent was like that. Maybe you could have been more open about your open positions.

The Pres. may not have helped your case either. Dunno what he really said to him. I would have hoped the president would have asked him to talk to you about the position before making a decision

2 Things my offense will always have is a Wing and a Wedge


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mahonz
(@mahonz)
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Joined: 11 years ago
Posts: 23063
 

I haven't had to ever deal with this because honestly around my area, most everyone has always known about both my boys and will never bring their "kid" over to compete. Saying "he'll never get a shot because he's the head coach"..... which is farthest from the truth!!!! I may be the head coach...yes, but I've always put kids that are the best for our team, never for my own goals. Yes my kid has trained extremely hard at his position, but that is no fault of his or mine. In fact I always issue an open invite to anyone who may want to come over and try out and during our evals, I specifically have a QB station so everyone can try out so we can get eyes on everyone 1st few days and don't even include my Lil guy in that station at all ever. In fact I'll pick out the best 2 from our evals, and once we break off into indys, they'll all 3 compete. If my lil guy gets beat out, so be it and I'm totally good with that.

Beginning of this year, had a kid who's an aspiring QB who's got some offseason training. He signed his kid up with our league along with bringing a few other studs along. 1 weeks before we start, he asks our president "who's the HC of the team" president says "so and so" (me), he says ok I think it's best I take my son else where because he won't get a shot at QB because of the HC. Why he would think that is beyond me. Competition breeds success. So he used that excuse to pull his kids and the kids he brought. Completely unfounded!!! Why is it everyone gets a bit of training and all of a sudden they're the best thing since sliced bread??? Seems people want to have things handed to them instead of working/competeing for it? Mind you he's never played a single down at QB. We all know how intensive it is to get the right kid for your team no matter what system you run whether it's spread or the double wing.

I'm seeing ALOT of dads over the years complain about their kid not getting shots at QB over these years and they always seem to be a cancer. At least 3 teams in our league are having this issue, all QBs.....all Dads. Dads shopping around for teams that throw, no matter how good or bad the coaches are.....screw it!!!! My kids a gun slinger and even if we lose every game....he's still throwing the rock!!!! Had a team lower that us go through that with a kids dad this year. Kid is actually pretty good. Dad asked "what offense are you running coach?" Coach replies "wing T, same as the last 13 years (mind you he's won every game for the last 6 years) dad says "oh, never mind my kids a spread read option QB, he'll never play in the wing T" WTF is going through these dads heads?

Why? Help me understand why these guys turn into monsters???

I get it.

I played HS football in the early 70's at a small private school that played in the highest classification because of their basketball program. The only way the football program could compete was by running the Tiger Ellison Polecat. We did well.

When I got into coaching....before my son was old enough to play.... I told myself if I ever get the power we are going to run super spread stuff.

By the time my son was a 5th grader I had the power and he was a phenom at the QB position. We crushed opponents. Still....the peanut gallery being who they are were who they are. I stepped aside his 8th grade season so he could do his thing without the whispers. Worked well.

Fast forward about 20 years and my son is coaching his son and afraid to put him in a position like QB or RB...even though his son was qualified.

Its just the way it is.

What is beautiful, lives forever.


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Popcoach11
(@popcoach11)
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Joined: 9 years ago
Posts: 424
Topic starter  

He always go to other stations because year after year I always tell him there will be a kid who's better that you, so if that happens, I need you ready to help somewhere else.  That's how we approach every year. Keeps him humble and grounded as we all know there's always someone bigger and better.

I know what I have already, no one else needs to know prior to getting into indys or team.

Plus I get a lot of hands on with eventually one of those kids who always turns out to be a very capable QB who can run and understands our system. A huge thing I've neglected to address in previous years is coaching up a capable QB.

Just this past weekend, our QB get smashed on the ball, loses his breath and actually feints because of it. We send in the kid who's got coached up and we never missed a beat.

Now the difference in talent is extremely apparent between the 2, but this kid has never played QB in a real game, but coaching him up allowed us to never miss a beat.


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patriotsfatboy1
(@patriotsfatboy1)
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Joined: 8 years ago
Posts: 3260
 

I have not had the daddy-ball issue with my kids.  Neither have been superior athletes, so they were never part of the discussion for key positions (pitcher, shortstop, QB, RB, etc.).  I have always been able to focus on putting the kids in spots that worked best for the team.  The reason that people make a big deal about it is because there are lots of HC's who have their son play QB and it is not always the right choice. 

Sometimes, it could be the OC's son that is the QB.  There are pros and cons to having them connected at the hip.  I have been in a situation where we had the OC's son play QB because he knew the plays the best, our offense was about distributing the ball and our other positions were better manned by other players.  Our BB was actually a better pure QB (smart, good arm, etc.) but our team was better when he was the BB.  Now that the BB is in HS, he is a QB.

This year, I took over a team where I have no kid on the team.  The best person for QB was also my OC's son.  It is still a work in progress and I think that sometimes there is too much conflict for them to both be happy, but we are working through it.  There has been no mistake, though, that the QB choice was mine and not Dad's. 


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COACH JC
(@winged)
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Joined: 9 years ago
Posts: 6999
 

I trip out on why people are obsessed w/ their kid playing QB in youth ball. Especially at the lower levels. Like, is it really that important for your kid to handoff 30 times a game?

It's all about having fun.  But losing aint fun!


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patriotsfatboy1
(@patriotsfatboy1)
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Joined: 8 years ago
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He always go to other stations because year after year I always tell him there will be a kid who's better that you, so if that happens, I need you ready to help somewhere else.  That's how we approach every year. Keeps him humble and grounded as we all know there's always someone bigger and better.

I know what I have already, no one else needs to know prior to getting into indys or team.

Plus I get a lot of hands on with eventually one of those kids who always turns out to be a very capable QB who can run and understands our system. A huge thing I've neglected to address in previous years is coaching up a capable QB.

Just this past weekend, our QB get smashed on the ball, loses his breath and actually feints because of it. We send in the kid who's got coached up and we never missed a beat.

Now the difference in talent is extremely apparent between the 2, but this kid has never played QB in a real game, but coaching him up allowed us to never miss a beat.

It seems to me that, if you treat your son differently, then it opens you up to questioning.  If the other kids are "trying out for QB", but the incumbent isn't there to rate against, how do you really know that you are doing an apples-to-apples comparison?  I am not saying that you are wrong in your evaluation, but it does leave the door open for questioning methods and intent. 


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Popcoach11
(@popcoach11)
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Topic starter  

It seems to me that, if you treat your son differently, then it opens you up to questioning.  If the other kids are "trying out for QB", but the incumbent isn't there to rate against, how do you really know that you are doing an apples-to-apples comparison?  I am not saying that you are wrong in your evaluation, but it does leave the door open for questioning methods and intent.

Like I said previously above, we go into every year with the mindset he's gonna have to help somewhere else. Once we come together in indys, it apparent the skill difference is huge and I've never had an issue what eventually happens.

My issue is with people predetermining the outcome without knowing the facts.


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coachmiket
(@coachmiket)
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Joined: 11 years ago
Posts: 1372
 

Like I said previously above, we go into every year with the mindset he's gonna have to help somewhere else. Once we come together in indys, it apparent the skill difference is huge and I've never had an issue what eventually happens.

My issue is with people predetermining the outcome without knowing the facts.

Like having him participate in every station except QB, then placing him at QB when you actually select positions... ;D


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JustPlay
(@rjbthor)
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Joined: 8 years ago
Posts: 559
 

Hey gents - QB Dad here and HC. (There is a real QB coach that works with him in the off season. I am just a slow receiver.) I tell my son every year he has to compete for the job. Its never a gimme. I dont run the O and I don't choose the offensive positions. Every week every job is up for grabs. ITs about winning. Teach your QB son its about the team winning and he wont care if he is a full back or a linemen or a CB or a DE. My son loves being a linebacker more than he loves to play QB.  QB position actually sucks to play unless you are in a read option spread system. Now my son is a hand off machine and is called on to make 3rd and long possible . Which means he is the goat when we hit it and the cause of all things wrong in the world we miss.

Anyhow - If a dad is shopping his kid around looking for the best spot I just pass. He will tun on you the second his kid fails.

nothing replaces effort. nothing replaces the mind. One with out the other is a waste of time.


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